comes glimpsing the world through anothers eyes; forsaking some habits and adopting others (good or bad tasting new ideas, rituals, foods or landscapes; a slew of added friends and family; a tapestry of physical intimacy and affection; and many other catalysts. That, plus the admittedly eccentric home schooling I provided, and his diligent practice, helped rewire his brain to a startling degree, and in time we were able to talk again, he returned to writing books, and even his vision improved. James Coan, a neuroscientist at the University of Virginia, conducted experiments in 2006 in which he gave an electric shock to the ankles of women in happy, committed relationships. Instead it may spend its lifeblood learning new things or fine-tuning the process of healing. Breaking old habits isnt easy, since habits are deeply ingrained neural shortcuts, a way of slurring over details without having to dwell on them. As the most social apes, we inhabit a mirror-world in which every important relationship, whether with spouse, friend or child, shapes the brain, which in turn shapes our relationships. Social pain can trigger the same sort of distress as a stomachache or a broken bone. The body remembers how that oneness with Mother felt, and longs for its adult equivalent. An infant is steeped in bright, buzzing, bristling sensations, raw emotions and the curious feelings they unleash, weird objects, a flux of faces, shadowy images and dreams but most of all a powerfully magnetic primary caregiver whose how to do a book research paper introduction wizardry astounds. Wedded hearts change everything, even the brain.
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So how does this play out beyond the lab? One can decide to be a more attentive and compassionate partner, mindful of the others motives, hurts and longings. Love is the best school, but the tuition is high and the homework can be painful. Mourning the loss of our duet of decades, I began exploring new ways to communicate, through caring gestures, pantomime, facial expressions, humor, play, empathy and tons of affection the brains epitome of a safe attachment. All he could utter was mem. At birth, the brain starts blazing new neural pathways based on its odyssey in an alien world. Does it also promote physical well-being? Every great love affair begins with a scream.